When
I picked up "You Know You're a Republican/Democrat If..." I expected
a collection of off-color, just the usual "I hate Bush," or "Kerry's
just a rich liberal" puns. I thought, given the title, the writer, like Jeff
Foxworthy in his redneck series, just picked low-hanging fruit.
It
is quite witty. Some jokes are reiterations of ones heard on Leno and Letterman,
redone in the "You know you're a" style, but others are current, fresh
and funny.
I
tried to guess the writer's political leaning, but the jokes are well-balanced.
He honestly pokes fun at whatever his side is, and thoroughly jabs the other.
My hat is off to him for not revealing who will get his vote.
Ironically,
left side of each spread is a Republican joke, and the right side is a Democrat
joke.
Some
of the jokes are based on simple stereotypes, like, "You know you're a Republican
if... you think Florida election officials are fair and unbiased. You know you're
a Democrat if you think 'fair Florida elections' is a contradiction in terms."
Other
jokes show keen wit, and understanding of the deeper philosophical differences
and inadequacies between each party and their adherents, like, "You know
you're a Republican if you've thought about becoming a Libertarian, but have trouble
with their philosophical support of prostitution, gay marriage, and uninhibited
personal freedom. You know you're a Democrat if you've thought about becoming
a Libertarian, but have trouble with their support of free trade." Another:
"You know you're a Republican if you prove your racial sensitivity by saying
'gracias' to your gardener. You know you're a Democrat if you're strongly committed
to racial equality even if you don't personally know anyone of a different race."
Two
of my favorites is, "You know you're a Republican if you're afraid of the
IRS. You know you're a Democrat if you're afraid of the FBI," and "You
know you're a Republican if you support George W. Bush's plan to put a man on
Mars. You know you're a Democrat if you want that man to be George W. Bush."
Maybe
the gem in the whole book is "You know you're a Republican if you think Colin
Powell might make a good President, if he wasn't black. You know you're a Democrat
if you think Colin Powell might make a good President, if he wasn't conservative."
This
is a book worth stocking in the bathroom, or for reading aloud on trips. Both
sides take some heat, so no will be offended.
Anthony
Trendl
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